Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Things You Can Buy for $1.2 Trillion

The Fed has been dropping coin lately like an old lady in Vegas. $300 billion for the very un-stimulating stimulus plan, $200 billion to save Fannie and Freddie's ass, and $700 billion for the gargantuan multi-bank bailout. That totals 1.2 trillion dollars. Yup, $1,200,000,000,000.00. That's a lot of bling. Just imagine what you could do with that kind of loot. Let's explore.

If you had a $1.2 trillion stack of thousand dollar bills, it would be 90 miles high.

You could buy the Trump Tower in New York, park a hundred 2009 Rolls Royce's on each it's 58 floors, and fill each Roll's with gold....something I suspect some of these fucking bankers were actually doing.

You could get a massage every day...for the next 33 million years.

You could buy MTV, and replace all the actors on The Hills with sophisticated robot-actors that would out-act the current cast.

You could buy every Taco Bell in the country, and stock it to the gills with Patron tequila (mmmmmm....)

You could give every human on earth $179.10.

You could remake the Lord of the Rings film trilogy 4,000 times....and I would kill myself.

You could buy the Cullinan I, the world's largest diamond....3,000 times.

You could buy every single American a PS3, Grand Theft Auto IV, and a pound of weed....and have an epic online mega-destruction tournament.

Wow, it sure is hard to think of any single thing that costs $1.2 trillion. Oh wait, I know!

You could fund the "wait, why are we doing this again?" war in Iraq for 15 years....we're half way there baby!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This was honestly a very, very fun thing to read.